Humorous Guide to Snapchat for Parents

My daughter recently turned 13 and as such wanted to join the wide world of Social Media.

I’ve heard the stories about these sites and decided I needed to keep an eye on things as she was learning the ropes so I, too, have joined the wide world of Social Media. I already had a Facebook account (and was happy to stay with just that), but thanks to my daughter’s 13th birthday, I now also belong to Snapchat. She was only too pleased to help me sign up and, thanks to her generosity, my Snapchat profile picture features me barfing a rainbow. No, really.

In case you have yet to join the world of [easyazon_link identifier=”B01CSY9TIE” locale=”US” tag=”greatbookgood-20″ cart=”n”]Snapchat[/easyazon_link], I thought I’d warn, um, I mean, show you the ropes. Here’s a quick FAQ on the world of Snapchat.

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Question: WHAT is Snapchat?

Answer: It’s a way of communication that can only be done via your cell phone. You can send text messages or pictures. These messages are supposed to disappear immediately after being viewed. I say the messages and pictures are SUPPOSED to disappear right after being viewed (and that is true for the actual Snapchat application), but there is something called a screen capture which can save a picture of whatever appears on a person’s cell phone. Internet Rule #1: NOTHING is really private or temporary on the internet and the more cringe-worthy something is that is posted, the more likely it will become public at the least opportune time. 

Question: What do people actually use Snapchat for?

Answer: By people, let’s be clear it’s almost exclusively teens that use Snapchat, and they send Selfies. All the time. Selfies, selfies, selfies. Occasionally someone might actually send something other than a selfie such as a message like: “Please, please, someone rescue me from Snapchat. I’m begging you.” That person would perhaps be the mom of a teenager who might or might not be me.

Question: Selfies? But what if your makeup needs touched up or you’re having a bad hair day or…

Answer: What? Come on, you’re a TEENAGER. You look great no matter what. Wait. You ARE a teenager, aren’t you??

Question: Yes, um, I mean, like, duh! I’m totally a teenager (30 years ago….). Next question. Once you take the selfie, then what do you do?

Answer: Why is this so hard? Obviously, you then put a filter on your selfie and make yourself look like a crazed, big-eyed bunny complete with nose and ears (no, really) and send it to your friends. All 500 of them.

Question: Then what?

Answer: They send a selfie back.

Question: What else do you do?

Answer: Else? What do you mean. Hold on, I have to send a selfie back. That is SO funny. She sent me a selfie looking like a deer so I’m going to send a selfie back looking like a fox and then she’ll send me a selfie looking like a rabbit and I’ll send one back looking like a….

Question: Ok, then. Since I have a busy life and not enough time to endlessly transform myself into woodland animals, I think I’ll be going now…

Answer: Wait, wait. You have to see this! See, she took a selfie and then using the Snapchat filters put antlers that pierced the rainbow over her head and it said: “Hey, Pretty Mama!”

Question: Now I’m seeing why these pictures disappear almost immediately because I’m going away, too.

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